Hasn’t the Brexit Party been covering us in glory this week (please feel free to substitute ‘buckets of shameless shit’ if you wish). Carry On films are said to be coming back, and Nigel Farage and his crazy crew are nipping in there with Carry On The EU Don’t Like It Up ’Em.
Heading up the glory list is former Tory Ann Widdecombe, the Brexit Party’s screech owl, who yesterday made a totally not completely barking mad speech, in her Carry On starring role as Hattie Facques.
Coming over as everyone’s least favourite potty aunt after a long afternoon on the sherry, she used her maiden speech in the European Parliament to compare Britain leaving the EU to “slaves” rising up “against their owners”.
Of course, the parallels are astonishing, especially the way the slaves voted to become slaves, were given a democratic say in how slavery was run and were such a right pain in the arse that the plantation owners were always bending over backwards to accommodate their demands.
Interviewed on Newsnight by Emma Barnett, Widdecombe was unrepentant and shouty, saying people had interpreted her speech in a “melodramatic fashion”.
Emma’s face as she listened was a picture, as if she was working on a local newspaper and had been called down again to reception to listen to the mad woman who comes in each week to say aliens are stealing her cats. She raised her eyebrows so far, they travelled all round her body before settling back in place with a quizzical shake.
Of course, Nigel Farage was at Ann’s side, nodding and grinning like a weird Svengali nephew with eyes on her bank account.
Batty Ann isn’t the only Brexit Party MEP getting high on being offensive. Earlier in the week, they were all at it. The new Brexit Party MEPs turned their backs at a ceremony to open the new European Parliament while talented young musicians played the Ode To Joy from Beethoven’s Ninth symphony, a lovely chorus long adopted as the Anthem of Europe.
These people may have narrowly won that referendum seemingly three centuries ago. But they don’t represent all of us. And turning their backs was childish, disrespectful and rude. It also made Britain look petty and stupid.
Coming in at number three is Brexit Party MEP David Bull who complained bitterly on social media that he hadn’t realised just how long it would take him to get to Strasbourg. How splendid – man gets well-paid job he applied for, then moans about having to travel there.
Of course, all these Europe-hating Brexit Party MEPs will be properly principled and give back their salaries and pension rights earned from an institution they mock and despise; won’t they?
Oh, look, I quite forgot to mention Nigel Farage coming on stage at a rally to wartime air-raid sirens. What is it with that man and the war? He’s 55, not 105 (although sometimes you wonder).